
“The Machine” is directed by Peter Atencio (Key & Peele, Keanu) and stars Bert Kreischer as himself, of sorts. Joining him is a cast including Mark Hamill (Star Wars, Kingsman: The Secret Service), Jimmy Tatro (Stuber, Home Economics), Iva Babić (The Last Serb in Croatia, Life Is a Trumpet), Stephanie Kurtzuba (The Wolf of Wall Street, Annie), and Jessica Gabor (Shameless, Grey’s Anatomy). This film is inspired by a stand-up routine and is about Bert Kreischer as he takes a trip to Russia, all the while continuously uncovering his past.

“The Machine” may have been the most last-minute purchase I have made as a moviegoer. I ended up going to see “The Machine” because I was at the theater with a friend to watch a press screening of “Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse,” only to be denied entry because of a capacity limit. We decided, with the options given to us, to go see this instead. Despite my bitter attitude, I tried to wear off the aftertaste of defeat and go into this film, albeit minutes late, with a fresh mindset.

“The Machine” is this year’s “Easter Sunday.” For the few of you who remember that movie, it is essentially an hour and a half of Jo Koy playing a hyped up version of himself and taking his stand up routine to the big screen, to less than stellar results. Having seen a number of stand up scenarios, including a few in person, I have learned that the crazier and seemingly far-fetched the story, the more appealing it can sound. Hearing someone talk about their time in Russia while reconnecting the dots of their past as a hyperactive, upbeat, heavily worded story, can be entertaining. In fact, as far as a pitch goes, if I were pitched the backbone of the story for this film, there is a good chance that I would consider greenlighting it. Much like a film I talked about recently, “Hypnotic,” “The Machine” is examplifies how an interesting concept can be fumbled in the execution.
“The Machine” has some likable elements intact. There are some occasional funny lines, the production design stands out at times, and Mark Hamill manages to steal the show every once in a while as Albert. If I have to name a favorite character in the movie, it would be him. I may be biased because I love Mark Hamill, but seeing the angle of him given throughout the picture made his character all the more appealing. Despite seeing Mark Hamill as other characters, I always harken back to Luke Skywalker when thinking about him. Therefore, seeing him drugged up in one scene, not to mention playing the part like a champ, caught me totally off guard. If there is any reason you should pay the price of admission for “The Machine,” Mark Hamill would have to be it. Everything else pales in comparison.

Another similarity I found between “The Machine” and “Easter Sunday” is that like Jo Koy, Bert Kreischer is a comedian I know very little about. But I have come to recognize that he has his fans. Having seen Jo Koy in “Easter Sunday,” I thought he was likable enough to the point where I would not watch a sequel to that film, but maybe I would go see him live and see how he does with that. I try to keep an open mind as often as I can, so maybe I would say the same about Bert Kreischer. A comedian, he may be. An actor, he is not. It is not to say he gives the worst performance I have ever seen, but after seeing Kreischer play an alternate version of his persona, I do not know if he has the strength to carry many productions down the road as a lead. In fact, having a more experienced actor like Mark Hamill play as significant of a character as he does here probably helps in some of the more important scenes to make everything feel a tad more immersive and realistic.
Kreischer faces the problem I feel a number of other comedians face, such as Kevin Hart or Kevin James, where they end up failing to disguise themselves and blend into the role they are given. To be fair, their material is often based in some form of reality and once you start typecasting a person, it is hard to stop. The difference between Kreischer and these two Kevins is that I have seen the Kevins in various productions over the years (and in standup, coincidentally), so inklings of themselves and their past characters will often show up in roles they take on down the road. Kreischer has minimal experience as an actor, and having seen this film, it kind of shows. He is in a word, serviceable. Nothing more, nothing less. That said, I am open to seeing him in another movie, but I doubt he will have any chances at an Academy Award in the next few decades.

If I had any other standout compliments to give to “The Machine” as a movie, I have to say I was delightfully surprised with some of the editing choices. “The Machine” has a quick, snappy pace to it, and a lot of the choices in the film’s edit reflect that. There are multiple creative uses of text and graphics. While this film may not have the most revolutionary jokes or action sequences, that is something I found myself delighted to see pop as much as it did.
Adaptations are everywhere you look these days. People often point out certain ideas that are originally made as books, video games, board games, and sometimes those ideas have a distinction of being “unfilmable.” While I have yet to see any of Bert Kreischer’s standup material, I can imagine his story about his time in Russia is ten times funnier as a standup routine. Similar to how some will claim a book is better than a movie, something interesting about standup is how it can often leave certain details up to the imagination. Sometimes visuals are involved, but it is usually a person talking onstage with a microphone. It is as simple as it gets, but it is the definition of turning nothing into something. “The Machine” takes that something and adds a lot more to it. One could argue that there may be an overabundance of something. This has helped Bert Kreischer build a fanbase based on his comedy. He could shock me in time, but for now, he should probably stick to that craft in particular.

In the end, “The Machine” is not offensive, nor is it a masterpiece. But to call it fine would be generous. I was not expecting much from this movie, but on the topic of expectations, I do not expect myself to watch “The Machine” again. Average comedy and okay action are not enough to make a good movie. There are plenty of other movies to watch in theaters right now, those might be better uses of your money at this time. I am going to give “The Machine” a 5/10.
“The Machine” is now playing in theaters everywhere. Tickets are available now.
Thanks for reading this review! You guys are about to get spoiled! Do not worry, I am not going to ruin “The Flash” for you, but that is one of the many reviews I have coming soon! In addition I will also be reviewing “The Blackening,” “Transformers: Rise of the Beasts,” “No Hard Feelings,” and “Elemental.” I will also be attending an early screening of “Ruby Gilman, Teenage Kraken” on Saturday, so whenever I am able to review that film, I will share my thoughts on that as well. If you want to see this and more from Scene Before, follow the blog either with an email or WordPress account! Also, check out the official Facebook page! I want to know, did you see “The Machine?” What did you think about it? Or, who is your favorite comedian? One of my favorites right now, is one I have tickets to see in Boston in November, specifically Jimmy Carr. He is raunchy, dark, and knows his way around an epic comeback. Let me know your favorite comedian down below! Scene Before is your click to the flicks!