Jimmy Tatro

The Machine (2023): A Barely Watchable Trip to Russia

Posted on by Jack Drees

“The Machine” is directed by Peter Atencio (Key & Peele, Keanu) and stars Bert Kreischer as himself, of sorts. Joining him is a cast including Mark Hamill (Star Wars, Kingsman: The Secret Service), Jimmy Tatro (Stuber, Home Economics), Iva Babić (The Last Serb in Croatia, Life Is a Trumpet), Stephanie Kurtzuba (The Wolf of Wall Street, Annie), and Jessica Gabor (Shameless, Grey’s Anatomy). This film is inspired by a stand-up routine and is about Bert Kreischer as he takes a trip to Russia, all the while continuously uncovering his past.

“The Machine” may have been the most last-minute purchase I have made as a moviegoer. I ended up going to see “The Machine” because I was at the theater with a friend to watch a press screening of “Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse,” only to be denied entry because of a capacity limit. We decided, with the options given to us, to go see this instead. Despite my bitter attitude, I tried to wear off the aftertaste of defeat and go into this film, albeit minutes late, with a fresh mindset.

“The Machine” is this year’s “Easter Sunday.” For the few of you who remember that movie, it is essentially an hour and a half of Jo Koy playing a hyped up version of himself and taking his stand up routine to the big screen, to less than stellar results. Having seen a number of stand up scenarios, including a few in person, I have learned that the crazier and seemingly far-fetched the story, the more appealing it can sound. Hearing someone talk about their time in Russia while reconnecting the dots of their past as a hyperactive, upbeat, heavily worded story, can be entertaining. In fact, as far as a pitch goes, if I were pitched the backbone of the story for this film, there is a good chance that I would consider greenlighting it. Much like a film I talked about recently, “Hypnotic,” “The Machine” is examplifies how an interesting concept can be fumbled in the execution.

“The Machine” has some likable elements intact. There are some occasional funny lines, the production design stands out at times, and Mark Hamill manages to steal the show every once in a while as Albert. If I have to name a favorite character in the movie, it would be him. I may be biased because I love Mark Hamill, but seeing the angle of him given throughout the picture made his character all the more appealing. Despite seeing Mark Hamill as other characters, I always harken back to Luke Skywalker when thinking about him. Therefore, seeing him drugged up in one scene, not to mention playing the part like a champ, caught me totally off guard. If there is any reason you should pay the price of admission for “The Machine,” Mark Hamill would have to be it. Everything else pales in comparison.

Another similarity I found between “The Machine” and “Easter Sunday” is that like Jo Koy, Bert Kreischer is a comedian I know very little about. But I have come to recognize that he has his fans. Having seen Jo Koy in “Easter Sunday,” I thought he was likable enough to the point where I would not watch a sequel to that film, but maybe I would go see him live and see how he does with that. I try to keep an open mind as often as I can, so maybe I would say the same about Bert Kreischer. A comedian, he may be. An actor, he is not. It is not to say he gives the worst performance I have ever seen, but after seeing Kreischer play an alternate version of his persona, I do not know if he has the strength to carry many productions down the road as a lead. In fact, having a more experienced actor like Mark Hamill play as significant of a character as he does here probably helps in some of the more important scenes to make everything feel a tad more immersive and realistic.

Kreischer faces the problem I feel a number of other comedians face, such as Kevin Hart or Kevin James, where they end up failing to disguise themselves and blend into the role they are given. To be fair, their material is often based in some form of reality and once you start typecasting a person, it is hard to stop. The difference between Kreischer and these two Kevins is that I have seen the Kevins in various productions over the years (and in standup, coincidentally), so inklings of themselves and their past characters will often show up in roles they take on down the road. Kreischer has minimal experience as an actor, and having seen this film, it kind of shows. He is in a word, serviceable. Nothing more, nothing less. That said, I am open to seeing him in another movie, but I doubt he will have any chances at an Academy Award in the next few decades.

If I had any other standout compliments to give to “The Machine” as a movie, I have to say I was delightfully surprised with some of the editing choices. “The Machine” has a quick, snappy pace to it, and a lot of the choices in the film’s edit reflect that. There are multiple creative uses of text and graphics. While this film may not have the most revolutionary jokes or action sequences, that is something I found myself delighted to see pop as much as it did.

Adaptations are everywhere you look these days. People often point out certain ideas that are originally made as books, video games, board games, and sometimes those ideas have a distinction of being “unfilmable.” While I have yet to see any of Bert Kreischer’s standup material, I can imagine his story about his time in Russia is ten times funnier as a standup routine. Similar to how some will claim a book is better than a movie, something interesting about standup is how it can often leave certain details up to the imagination. Sometimes visuals are involved, but it is usually a person talking onstage with a microphone. It is as simple as it gets, but it is the definition of turning nothing into something. “The Machine” takes that something and adds a lot more to it. One could argue that there may be an overabundance of something. This has helped Bert Kreischer build a fanbase based on his comedy. He could shock me in time, but for now, he should probably stick to that craft in particular.

In the end, “The Machine” is not offensive, nor is it a masterpiece. But to call it fine would be generous. I was not expecting much from this movie, but on the topic of expectations, I do not expect myself to watch “The Machine” again. Average comedy and okay action are not enough to make a good movie. There are plenty of other movies to watch in theaters right now, those might be better uses of your money at this time. I am going to give “The Machine” a 5/10.

“The Machine” is now playing in theaters everywhere. Tickets are available now.

Thanks for reading this review! You guys are about to get spoiled! Do not worry, I am not going to ruin “The Flash” for you, but that is one of the many reviews I have coming soon! In addition I will also be reviewing “The Blackening,” “Transformers: Rise of the Beasts,” “No Hard Feelings,” and “Elemental.” I will also be attending an early screening of “Ruby Gilman, Teenage Kraken” on Saturday, so whenever I am able to review that film, I will share my thoughts on that as well. If you want to see this and more from Scene Before, follow the blog either with an email or WordPress account! Also, check out the official Facebook page! I want to know, did you see “The Machine?” What did you think about it? Or, who is your favorite comedian? One of my favorites right now, is one I have tickets to see in Boston in November, specifically Jimmy Carr. He is raunchy, dark, and knows his way around an epic comeback. Let me know your favorite comedian down below! Scene Before is your click to the flicks!

Stuber (2019): Somewhat Worthy of a Tip

Posted on by Jack Drees

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“Stuber” is directed by Michael Dowse (What If, Man Seeking Woman) and stars Kumail Nanjiani (The Big Sick, Silicon Valley) and Dave Bautista (Guardians of the Galaxy, Blade Runner 2049). This film is about a duo who meet at a random point in time, setting up an unexpected adventure. One guy is an Uber driver and the other is a cop on a mission. Stu, the Uber driver, is assisting Vic, the cop, in completing said mission.

I saw this film last night as part of an advanced screening. I was gonna go see it a couple weeks back, but I ended up canceling that commitment for several reasons. However, I got to take another chance at an advanced screening and I was not gonna let it go to waste. “Stuber” was HEAVILY advertised on my TV. Every time I had my cable on truTV or some other similar channel, it was almost a guarantee that I would see an ad for “Stuber” throughout a majority of the commercial breaks. If I had a nickel for every time I saw a “Stuber” ad before checking this movie out, I’d probably use that to pay for a good portion of a ticket to go see “Stuber” with the public. And there are many times when I saw the ads to which they made me grin. I thought Nanjiani and Bautista would make an excellent buddy-esque pair, and the movie would have the same, proper action-comedy vibe that a film like “Central Intelligence” managed to provide.

How was “Stuber” you ask? Well, instead of answering that question outright, part of me wants to remind you all that I wanted to become a game show host. Because I could easily ask such a question, go to a commercial break, and reveal my thoughts when the show returns. But I can’t do that, because this is the blog of the movie reviewing moron. So, if that statement does not provide any hints, the answer to that question nearly resembles a wheel of confusion. But if I had to provide an answer at this moment, I’d say the movie was fun and humorous, which is the least I can ask for from a comedy. But the reason why I feel like I have a wheel of confusion in my mind is because even though the movie made me laugh, it is simultaneously clashing with a number of awkward or less than interesting moments. But the good news is, all of it doesn’t feel like it lasts forever due to the movie’s short runtime of an hour and thirty-three minutes. The film is a breeze to get through even with it’s flaws. So did I enjoy it? Absolutely! Would I give it a second watch? Sure! …On TBS.

If you ask me, the writing for “Stuber” is decent enough comedy-wise. It has a number of smart jokes that involve possible annoyances when it comes to driving an Uber, a number of gags involving Nanjiani’s driving, and the blending of the scaredy cat driver and fearless cop.

I will say though, on that second part, one thing that I found interesting was the choice to make Kumail Nanjiani’s car a Nissan Leaf. Partially because it is an electric car, which manages to bring in a certain flair to the film that would have not been present had the car been absent, and to my personal surprise, it did not make the movie feel like a commercial. Granted, one of the car’s crucial features (and downfalls) happen to make an appearance in the film at a certain point, but it flowed nevertheless. There’s a moment at the end of the film that makes the movie almost feel like a commercial for Uber, but it saves itself from becoming one at the last minute. Granted, it almost made me want to buy a Nissan Leaf, but if you don’t know me, I kinda care about the environment in some ways so I had a thought like that in my head before going to see this movie.

Moving onto characters, Kumail Nanjiani does a fine job at portraying the Uber driver who has no other desire than to just stay away from danger. But I also kind of admire how part of the movie’s plot tries to emphasize the importance of his character’s “five star wishes.” He asks his customers to give him a five star rating, he wants to keep himself in a good combined rating position in order to continue being a driver, and while it was sometimes funny to read some of the one star reviews for Nanjiani, I felt his pain as I read those because for what I saw, he was doing everything he can to impress his customers. Sadly though, his chemistry with Dave Bautista, while somewhat effective, was kind of off at times.

In fact, when it comes to Bautista (right), he’s very hit or miss in this movie. I buy him as a cop who kicks ass and takes names, but there are a select few moments, which are too unimportant to talk about, where I felt like he was stumbling in the acting department. Granted, Bautista was never really the best actor to begin with. I imagine he is a lovely guy, and he can occasionally provide a fun screen presence kind of like he did in the “Guardians of the Galaxy” movies, but there are select moments where he would say one line and it feels out of place based on the way Bautista executed said line. Although one of the best parts of Bautista’s character in this film is that he goes through the entire runtime with poor eyesight, we see various shots that provide his character’s perspective. He has to stare at a handheld eye chart and each shot is fuzzy, I thought it was a good way to highlight the character’s weakness. And despite how serious blindness can be in real life and how much it can ruin or alter one’s outlook on things, there was a moment in the film leading up to the eventual pairing of Nanjiani and Bautista that I thought was very funny. Unfortunately, despite some hilarity between the pair, it didn’t click at every solitary second.

Another problem I had with the movie is despite the short runtime, there are a lot of crucial plot points that go into it, which is fine, but these plot points felt like loose Jenga blocks on the verge of falling to the ground. Would the movie be fine with its additional plot points staying in? Absolutely. But they nevertheless almost felt like they could have been left out of the screenplay. If that were the case, the movie might have ended up being better because we can focus on the dynamic duo as opposed to anything else. Granted, Nanjiani’s character had a rather interesting side story (two of them in fact), but there’s one of them that feels like it BARELY has a purpose of being in the film. I won’t go into much detail, but still.

In the end, “Stuber” is a fun comedy to watch, maybe at matinee price, or once it becomes free on television. Nevertheless, it kind of feels like a throwaway movie, which is somewhat disappointing because I was looking forward to this, and I thought it was going to be better than it ultimately was. For crying out loud, the first screening I tried to get into for this film was held two weeks prior to the film’s release! I guess the studio had some faith in “Stuber” before it came out! Nanjiani and Bautista as a pair resemble a game of “Pong.” You may get some lucky hits, but a few less than satisfying misses. But compared to “Pong,” “Stuber” is much easier to get through. I’m going to give “Stuber” a 6/10.

Thanks for reading this review! I just want to let everyone know that this Monday I am going to be continuing my Quentin Tarantino review series, and I have decided that my second review is going to be for “Django Unchained” starring Jamie Foxx (Ray, Collateral) as a freed slave who teams up with a bounty hunter to help him reunite with his wife. I just watched the film this past Tuesday and I will have my thoughts on it posted as soon as Monday approaches. Be sure to follow Scene Before to check out that post in the future, please support the blog by subscribing through your WordPress account or email, and if you are on Facebook, check out my page! Also, I don’t demand a 5 star rating, but clicking that LIKE star on the post would definitely be appreciated! I want to know, did you see “Stuber?” What did you think about it? Or, either as a customer or an employee, what is one of your most interesting, best, or worst Uber experiences? It can even be for Lyft for all I care! Let me know down below! Scene Before is your click to the flicks!